Unprocessed emotional pain makes a woman deflect her instincts and emotions and she keeps being pulled back into the vortex of her thinking mind. Women are not often taught what makes us unique and precious which results in trying to conquer the places where we feel hurt and betrayed in a very masculine way.
The majority of women I work with try to “figure their way out” of the dissonance they feel within their bodies.
Dissonance = she feels a certain way but was conditioned to think differently and now is experiencing an inner split (…I was taught that my career is going to fulfill me, but I am feeling an overwhelming sense of emptiness and unworthiness even after I achieved my “goals”. My mind tries to make sense of this experience but a part of me is still heartbroken and tired from climbing the ladder of success …)
A woman who dissociates from her heart and body and finds a safe haven in her mind. Instead of going through life with curiosity, wonder, and openness, she needs to control, manipulate, and defend herself.
And the empowered masculine can see right through her defenses. He is going to read the dissonance as a threat – I can’t trust her, she is saying one thing but her body is communicating something completely different. This is when he can say that “you are not here”, “he can´t connect with you” or “he doesn’t know what you want”
This is what triggers the little girl in us (the reactivity, drama, and nagging) that is screaming – I need YOU to see me, I need YOU to hear me and I need you to VALIDATE me because I don´t know how to do it for myself. You can catch yourself saying “I am doing everything right and it is never enough for you.”
The trap here is that the empowered masculine doesn´t want to be her keeper, he is not looking for a child, but for an equal.
In the last layer, we return to our original design. We learn to hold the little girl in our heart and we learn to create a safe haven for her in a place where she has always belonged.
The little girl seeking love and connection needs the protection of the wise inner parent.
A woman comes home to herself when she is free to experience the fullness of her emotions and her heart and she is allowed to stay and rest there as long as she needs.
A mature mind and heart joined in union allow us to experience and understand a full spectrum of human emotions and experiences. We stop seeking for a parent and we are able to see our partner for who they truly are. The crucial discernment is born and alive in our life.
I teach women how to come back home to their heart and experience a new level of fulfillment in their relationships in my private 3-month program.