Photo by lucas mendes on Unsplash
Working with women from all over the world and helping them to connect with their feminine souls and live from a place of heart-centered connection and joy, has given me an opportunity to understand our feminine nature and all the coping mechanisms that prevent us from living in our radiance.
One of these coping strategies is always wondering “What´s next?”.
Envisioning where you are going is not harmful as long as it is not preventing you from soaking in and enjoying the fullness of the present moment and the life you have created so far.
To access our feminine radiance and magnetism we want to slow down and become present in our life and our inner world. One of my clients beautifully described this feeling of presence and openness as being “turned on” by life.
Life and the divine masculine (the aspect of life – God which is meant to support you and provide) is communicating with your feminine heart always in the present moment through insights, people, ideas, revelations, and gifts.
Your inner child and feminine are talking to you as well – through desires and feelings or triggers, longing, and obstacles that feel like invisible walls.
When we are not willing to be with the present moment we are going to miss the dance between these energies, which makes the right path and the next best step unclear and our inner world muddy and confusing.
What then makes it so hard for a woman to surrender to the present moment and trust that she is the ultimate receiver of whatever it is that she desires?
It is her inner child who tries to escape the past, but who is also unknowingly recreating it through unhealed wounds in the present. Women usually don´t know that it is the wounded little girl in them who is feeling hopeless, lost, anxious, or who yearns for love and connection and they keep fighting her/fighting themselves and brushing their emotions off.
Meanwhile, the inner child so desperately needs our attention which would allow her to release the inner tension in a healthy way. The more we hustle and hurry the more we are reinforcing the inner war and the subconscious split which fuels our feminine reactivity (drama).
Our masculine defenses will go inevitably up as a result of carrying unprocessed pain:
“I am fine.” (while feeling like your heart is sinking deeper and deeper into your stomach)
“I don´t need help, thanks!”
“I can do it on my own.”
“Others have it worse.”
“At least there are some positives to the situation…”
“I´ve learned to deal with it… It´s not that bad.”
These are all examples of how we tend to bypass our feminine emotions and disconnect from our heart and from life itself.
Why is it so important to cultivate the emotional maturity and ability to recognize when the next best step is being revealed to you?
Because you are the only receiver of your path.
Your next inspired step is going to look completely different from someone else´s next best step.
Women with feminine essence inherently know that trying to follow strict strategies or someone else´s path to what they want doesn´t feel good in the long run. It is as if you put an artificial structure on top of your original design and the wisdom of your heart. Life loses its magic and you lose yourself in trying to “get it right” (hint: there is no “right”)
The divine masculine is not going to reward you for being “good” and “sticking to the rules” or “sucking it up”. These beliefs stem uniquely from our societal conditioning and emotional immaturity (codependency). The divine masculine is your biggest supporter and “he” already knows what steps you need to take to create the life you desire. Your role is to stay open, trust the messages, and let your feminine intuition receive them.
In the same way you can´t DO anything to receive or force the right ideas to come to you, you also can´t think your way to a fulfilling relationship. Intimacy is being created in the moment by staying emotionally available and present. The next best step for YOU is going to be revealed to you in the present moment when your feminine (subconscious mind) is relaxed, calm, turned on by life, and open to receive.
Learning to let go of the masculine defenses and walls that make a woman wonder “What´s next?” -because she is trying to escape the life she has created and also because she doesn´t trust that she is worthy of receiving – open a whole new paradigm for her. One where it is safe to feel her emotions and safe to receive her heart´s desires.
To create a solid foundation for relationships that feel supportive, safe, nourishing, joyful, and exciting in a good way we want to work with the mind-body-emotion system as a whole. We are integrating the masculine and feminine, the intellect and intuition.
That is why in my one-on-one program we work on three crucial areas:
#1 Feminine genius – I guide my clients towards cultivating a deeply intimate relationship with themselves and their heart where no part of them is off-limits, shamed, or labeled as negative. Accessing the ability to connect and understand the language of their body, emotions, and subconscious often feels “counterintuitive” or like they are growing a new muscle but it is inevitable if we want to dissolve the confusion and mental restlessness and help her discern a healthy relationship partner as fast as possible, so that those who are not a good fit don´t deplete her energy and so that she doesn´t waste her precious time on fantasy relationships.
#2 Masculine support – I use a specific set of mind-body practices that help my clients to regulate their nervous system, create an internal support system, and learn how it FEELS to be in a healthy relationship dynamic (sometimes for the first time in their life). They learn how to slow down their defense mechanisms while exploring and anchoring a new feeling of being the RECEIVER (which naturally and gently dissolves the performing and overgiving mode). This new mind-body connection translates into every area of their life from parenting to romantic relationships and relationships with their family members and for many of them leads to greater success and fulfillment in their career.
#3 Integration and expression – We allow the newfound sense of freedom and healthy relationship dynamics to inform their external support systems through tangible baby-step actions. My clients are allowed to “protect” the parts of them that were the driving force of the unhealthy behavior and they learn how to nourish them and their needs in a healthy way. Because they have learned to open up the communication between their subconscious (body and emotions) and conscious mind, they don´t need to look for invisible blocks or obstacles. They simply get to be themselves. Creating this level of self-trust rehabilitates their trust in the external masculine and life itself.
This is what I teach new clients in my 10-week Whole and Worthy program for emphatic ambitious women who want to find an empowered partner without overworking themselves or those who want to deepen the intimacy in their existing relationships and cultivate a sense of fulfillment and feminine genius in their career. The program consists of ten private 60-90 minute-long sessions and individual homework for deeper integration. My private program is a low four-figure investment and if it sounds like you are the right fit, you can sign up by filling out the application form.
