Did you ever think about the way we think? It may sound strange, but let me explain. When you sit quietly or when you try to meditate and observe your thoughts, you will most likely find out that thoughts simply arise without you doing much. They come and go and they trigger certain emotions in your body depending on whether they are in synch with who you truly are or not. Therefore, you can immediately stop beating yourself up for not always thinking positively. The truth is that thoughts arise in our consciousness based on what we heard when we were growing up and based on what we have believed to be true. So I am going to provide you with certain techniques you can practice instead of trying to get rid of unwanted thoughts or trying to think positively all the time, which can eventually become really frustrating.
Becoming aware of our inner dialogue
Before we can transcend a certain type of behavior we need to be aware of the fact that we unconsciously cultivated the unwanted habit and we have to take full responsibility for it in order to move on. In case of fearful and hateful inner dialogue, or in other words in case of the detrimental thoughts we tend to entertain, we have to first and foremost become aware of them. However, it does not mean that when we think a hurtful thought there is something wrong with us. Thoughts arise and if you believed them you just didn´t know how to do better at that moment in time. Our environment usually doesn´t teach us how to think or how to love ourselves when we are growing up, but now we have the opportunity to become who we truly are not who we thought we were according to the beliefs we internalized. One of the most effective ways to start observing your thoughts is meditation accompanied by the questioning of your thoughts. Firstly we have to learn to detach from our thinking and to take our power back and then we can practice questioning the thoughts that appear in our mind with the truth that is always held safe in our heart.
Changing the stories we tell ourselves
The thoughts we keep thinking are internalized as beliefs – we make them a part of who we are and we stop questioning whether they are true or not – and the beliefs create our inner story or inner dialogue. There would be nothing wrong with that, however, the story we keep telling ourselves is at the cause of our experience of life. If you believe that you are not worthy, you will be prone to meeting people who will be ready to prove to you that what you think about yourself is truer than true. The world you see is mostly a reflection of your inner state of being. The relationship you cultivate with yourself is projected by your mind onto everyone you meet. Life rearranges all the events and relationships to bring you the evidence of the story you keep telling yourself.
In order to change the story, you have to stop listening to fear and start believing the loving intelligence that created you. The truth of who we are was installed in us from the beginning of time – we know it and we can feel it in the center of our heart. However, looking for it outside of ourselves in other people, places, and circumstances, keeps us from accessing the wisdom of our being that is already there. The best way to take care of the story you keep telling yourself is to create some well-being habits that will be fun to follow and that will allow you the connection to your true Self. You can be creative and choose whatever tools you want to use, but the main goal is that they should reinforce a feeling of ease and self-love. Therefore, choose the tools that you feel naturally inclined to. You really don´t need to add more instruments of torture into your life.
Being patient with yourself and giving yourself all the love and time that you need
Rewriting and questioning the fearful stories we used to think about the world and ourselves takes practice and time. Sometimes a lot of time. But I believe that everyone who seeks the truth has to find it one day sooner or later because once you decide that you had enough of suffering and inner torture, the whole existence is going to support your decision to see things differently. You are loved and you are supported, but your fearful stories prevented you from seeing it. You are the creator, as well as the creation. Your life is yours to create and all the power is within you. The only piece you have been probably missing is your love. Your love towards your Self is going to unlock your power to heal yourself, to forgive yourself and others and to lead a miraculous life.
So always remember that whatever you do or not do, whatever you try or not try… you are always doing your best. You are always trying hard, even if you don´t think you are. The only thing that holds you from everything you want to be and everything you want to manifest is that you don´t think that you are worthy of your own love. If no one ever gave you permission to love yourself, I am here now to give you one. It is not selfish. It really is necessary. Only your love can heal you. The loving all-embracing intelligence that created you loves you unconditionally. It does not need any condition to allow you to breathe or to make your heart beat. You have been the only one who has been withdrawing your love from yourself so far. If other people didn´t know how to love you unconditionally, it is because they didn´t love themselves. But, ultimately, you are the love of your life, you are the truth and the way. It is time to forgive yourself and to start celebrating even the smallest achievements along the way to your inner peace and freedom.