Are you tired of life getting in your way? I can totally relate to that. You want to accomplish a dream or follow through on your goals, but then something happens and you´re right where you started. It seems like we are building sand castles and when a storm comes it simply blows everything down. Now, the question is: What is the foundation of our efforts? My life changed radically when I started to become aware of the fact that I so often failed to keep the promises I gave myself. Let´s look how our life can change when we start keeping promises we give ourselves:
You´ll stop lying to yourself
When keeping a promise to yourself, you should apply the same rules as you do when making a promise to someone else. It means never make a promise you know you won´t keep. Not keeping promises you give to yourself has devastating results on your confidence and self-worth. If you fail to keep your promise, you feel incapable, useless and powerless. You don´t take yourself seriously, because you know that you can talk yourself out of anything you´ve promised yourself. Sometimes we just have to get to the point when we can no longer cope with the lies we believe and the way our lives are directed. In that moment we have two options, we can either blame other people and life for the circumstances we find ourselves in or we can just simply see our situation as a result of choices we´ve made so far. How many times have you made a promise to yourself and you didn´t keep it? How many times have you let yourself down? From my own experience I know that I´ve let myself down more times than other people have let me down multiplied by a thousand. If we are going to be honest with ourselves, in the majority of situations we already know that we are going to break a promise in the moment we are making it. We can´t change what we are not aware of. Before we can change something we have to acknowledge its existence first. So, look at all the situations when you didn´t have your back. How does it look like for you? Do you stop because you´re afraid of the unknown that waits for you at the other side of your dream? Do you break a promise because you didn´t make your happiness your priority? The point is not to get frustrated, but to start being honest with your Self. Just feel the feeling of letting yourself down for a moment. Then know that you are the only person who is in charge of your life and the promises you give.
Instead of hopeless you´ll feel powerful
You know yourself well enough to recognize when you are not one hundred percent committed to your goal. If you are like me, you won´t always admit it, not even (especially not) to yourself. So the first step in sticking to our plans is to look honestly at every time we´ve let ourselves down. Bringing awareness to the habit you want to let go of is the first step toward taking responsibility for the choices you make. Just admitting, that you were not always there for you, will allow you to take your power back. Isn´t it liberating to finally know that you´re the one you´ve been waiting for? Respecting yourself means honoring every promise you make, regardless of whether it´s something you promised yourself or the others. When you become accountable for your decisions you “own” them. Suddenly, the direction your life takes lies in your hands. If you feel like the people close to you are not supporting you in a new direction, the only question you should ask is: Am I supporting myself? Am I honoring my promise? The way life works is that when you start taking yourself seriously, others will take you seriously as well. You can´t persuade life to give you something that is not a match to who you are. Freedom, clarity and power are not something you can receive from external sources, they can be only found within, and are stemming from the connection you have with yourself and God/life/love. Therefore this quote sums it all up: “What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals (Zig Ziglar).”
You can trust yourself that you´ll handle anything that comes your way
You become your best friend, when you know that there is always one person you can count on and that is you. Having loving relationships with others starts with creating an honest relationship with ourselves. The more you work on the relationship you have with yourself, the more the other relationships in your life are going to shift. When you roll up your sleeves and you are finally willing to build a connection with your Self, which is based on trust, you´ll be able to look at your fearful thoughts and you´ll start working on them one by one. Being honest with yourself takes courage and stillness. However, by becoming aware of the lies we tell ourselves, we will also be able to find boundless compassion and love, which was inside of us all this time. It will be this love for yourself and your precious life that is going to heal every wound you´ve caused yourself by breaking your promises. Once you decide that you have your own back, life will rush to support you in everything you will do with a pure intention and an open heart.
The best kind of freedom comes from knowing who we are,
Now, I would love to hear from you and how you manage to keep the promises you make to yourself. Are you struggling with it or have you already figured it out? What do you usually promise yourself? Do you keep your word?